I have been asked repeatedly by both men and women how I ended up an LBB. They don’t always buy the answer that I’m just a “late bloomer.” I don’t think they are necessarily saying how-could-someone-like-you-not-be-snatched-up, either. Cuz really, I’m an ordinary person. But, rather they wonder how could any woman not meet someone they wanted to marry before age 40.

Reason one: I was always interested in true love. But, never really desperate to get married. Maybe that was stamped on my forehead?

Reason two: I did meet two men I wanted to marry. But, they didn’t want to marry me. I am embarrassed to admit that, at times, I prayed, schemed, scratched and clawed, and downright screamed WHY DON’T YOU WANT TO MARRY ME? to at least one of them. But, what’s that song lyric? Thank God for unanswered prayers.

But, in the spirit of honesty, those are not the real reason.

The truth is I wasted more than a decade on the wrong guy(s).

And, guys have a code. Thou shall not covet thy friends loot. Well, they might covet. But, they aren’t asking it out.

So, for 11.6 years (I counted because I just like to torture myself), I was unavailable to the right guy. Intead, I was with the following men: J, T, M, C, J, K , R and T.  (Not all at once. One at a time. I’m not that good.)

J. was the college boyfriend. Two years. Gone. But, that’s the way it is supposed to be, right?

A little while later, I expended two years with T. We were best friends, and it really should have just stayed that way.

I spent 6 months with M. (Sigh.) Former male model and windsurfing champion. Lust is a powerful – and sometimes destructive — thing.

C. was about 4 months. But he didn’t show up for dinner one night. Turns out he was meant to run away with (female) J. to Las Vegas and get married. (Remember, I promised to tell you the truth.) But, it’s all good. They were supposed to be together.

Then, I was with J., a pathological liar, who couldn’t help himself. He also married the next woman after me. In fact, it was the next morning after our last date. My friend Y — who called to let me know — can attest to that fact.

Spent 2 years with K. Nice guy. I just wasn’t into NASCAR.

R. was the biggest mistake. Wasted about 3 years if you include the long, slow, climb out of the black hole he threw me into. (I promised to tell the truth, not always be big about it.)

And, there were others. The usual three to four month dating periods with various playmates of whom, today, I could not pick out of a police line-up. (Sorry.)

 So, why do I tell you all this? Because

1 – be thankful you did not end up with your alphabet soup, and

2 – let go when you know it’s not right. Even today. Goodbye is a second chance.

For every goodbye you do not say when you really, really know should, you inch your way closer to LBB status. It’s not bad to be an LBB. It’s just, well, later. And, wants to wait?

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