Name: Sabrina

Age: 53

Occupation: Owner of social media company

Sabrina says she never thought she would get married after 40. But, she did, and joined the ranks of the Late Bloomer Brides in 2004. Her romantic story began on Valentine’s Day that year. “We married on top of the Empire State Building, and then we repeated our vows on our fifth wedding anniversary.” Such a romantic story has to be told then! We interviewed Sabrina to get her sage advice on marrying – and what to look for – after age 40.

What was your age when you got married? 45

How did you meet your husband? I lived in Ohio my whole life, dating different people but not getting married. I wanted to, so I decided to move. I asked for a transfer from my employer, which had an office in New York City (and where my sister already lived). I just had a strong feeling I’d find my husband in New York.  I arrived on July 3, stayed with my sister for a few days and on the following Monday moved into my new apartment. That day, I walked around the corner to look at neighborhood and came across a little pizza shop. And, there I saw him.  I ordered a soda, and then continued to return every day for a month. Finally, we went out in August, and got married the following Valentine’s Day.

What did your family say when you got married older? My family thought I would never get married. I used to go to family reunions and they would question my “direction” asking me if I even like men. Yes, I like men, I just made bad choices. (Editorial note: Been there. Done that, too.) Once it was time, my family was mixed – some cautious, some ecstatic. My friends were very ecstatic.

What do you find the most surprising about marriage? There is such an appreciation for being married when getting married in your 40s — gratitude for the partnership, and the support in what you can do together. I also find a huge appreciation for time. You only live for so long anyway. When things are good, you think  I wish I had met you 20 years earlier (But, she says, her Husband responds,  you wouldn’t have liked me 20 years earlier. Wink.) It’s just sweeter. Plus you’re so different in your 20s.

What do you find surprising about marriage? Not much. It just gets better every day and better every year. I’m pleased with how things have gone, especially when you see things in the news about people having bad marriages.

What do you miss the most about single life? That is hard for me to answer. I miss things I did in Ohio and those experiences. But, they were based around my girlfriends. I do miss going out with girlfriends after work and having dinner.  But, now, I want to come home and spend time with my husband.

Do you have any advice for the over-40 woman seeking love and marriage? Do not give up. Definitely do not settle. Do not settle for a relationship that does not honor you. It’s so easy to think, this is as good as it’s going to get. I’ll settle for this person. But, you are not put on this earth to be miserable with a mate.

I think in my early 20s, there was a guy I wanted to marry. But, my family said I didn’t have to. So, I didn’t. Then, after I just didn’t find anyone I felt I wanted to be married to, live in a house with, and be with every single day. I didn’t find the right person, until I saw my Husband and said this is it.

If you’re super picky, that might make it difficult. But, if you are normal and sane, don’t settle for someone who will disrespect you. Be open about it. Your husband can be a lawyer or a bus driver. But keep your horizons open for a good person.

 What is one word you would use to describe marriage? Fun.